Here is my New Year wish list.
1. I wish that all apprentice suicide bombers would accidentally blow themselves up along with their instructors. Then they could all go to heaven and leave us ordinary mortals alone to get on with our lives.
2. I wish that all gangsters and drug pedlars would start a turf war and kill each other so that we ordinary humans could walk safely outside and enjoy God’s earth.
3. I wish that all burglars would be savaged by the family pet rottweiler.
4. I wish that all would-be rapists should become impotent because of some incurable sexual disease before they were able to rape.
5. I wish that all scheming motor car highjackers would be flattened by a runaway 100-tonne mobile cement mixer on their way to the planned scene of the crime.
6. I wish that any politician who deliberately tells a lie for his own personal gain would immediately be struck dumb.
7. I wish that anyone who knows any of the above persons would expose them.
How much better the world would be without them.
And finally I wish that those who remain behind after the above purge would appreciate the lovely world we live in and do all in their power to keep it that way.
